Smashburger with onion rings

Two Forks for Five Bros. Grill

318 Forum’s always-hungry reporter often has lunch at a local restaurant and tells you about the experience.

I miss the days when life was easy.

For example, when you wanted a hamburger, you ordered one. You didn’t have to do a lot of thinking. You didn’t have to do a lot of explaining.

Getting a hamburger was about as simple as it got.

But a few years ago, life became complicated.

Exhibit A: The smashburger. Restaurants added the smashburger to their menu. Some even served smashburgers instead of hamburgers.

My friend, Google, explains a smashburger as “a thin, uniform burger patty made by pressing a ball of fresh ground beef onto a hot griddle.” Sounds like a cheap hamburger to me. There’s a new place in Bossier City called Five Bros. Grill (2119 Airline Drive, Suite 900), and guess what their specialty is? The smashburger. So, on a recent Friday night, a friend and I went to find out if the smashburgers at Five Bros. Grill were smashingly better than a hamburger.

We arrived just after seven o’clock and found the well-appointed dining area with modern country music playing to be a busy place. People were eating, people were waiting to eat, and people were picking up to-go orders. Five Bros. Grill isn’t big – six tables, five booths and five seats at the counter. I couldn’t see the grill, but I could hear the sizzle, which stimulated my hunger.

You can place your order at a kiosk, but being first-timers, my friend and I decided to study the menu board and ask a few questions of the lady at the register. Five Bros. Grill offered two types of smashburgers, each with different toppings and condiments. For old-timers like me, there were also hamburgers and cheeseburgers available in various sizes, along with a few other items.

After careful consideration, I chose #2, a smashburger with grilled onions, mayonnaise, BroSauce, ketchup and my choice of American or Pepper Jack cheese (I chose Pepper Jack). Since I was a smashburger newbie (and really hungry), I threw caution to the wind and had a double patty ($11.99). For an extra $5.50, I made it a meal, which included a drink and my choice of fries swirl wedges, regular, Cajun) or Onion Rings. I went with regular fries.

Strawberry milkshake

My friend also had a smashburger but chose a single patty ($7.99). However, she loves onion rings and decided to have those instead of fries.

We placed our order at 7:11 and took our seats in a booth. All the while, Five Bros. Grill was busy — people coming in, people going out, people waiting. Ah, yes ... people waiting. As the clock ticked, we noticed folks who had been there when we arrived still had not received their food. Unfortunately, that was a sign of things to come.

At 7:44 — 33 minutes after ordering our burgers and with my stomach starting to growl — I was about to ask the lady behind the counter if perhaps our order had been lost. But that’s when one of the restaurant’s hard-working staff members came to our booth and apologized for the long wait. He said several cooks didn’t show up for work, and the restaurant was using “fill-in” cooks.

Two minutes later — at 7:46 — we were served our food. Thirty-five minutes was a long time to wait for a couple of hamburgers — I mean, smashburgers — so I was skeptical about whether they would be worth the wait.

The result was a split decision. My smashburger tasted more like a saltburger. I am being as kind (and honest) as possible — all I tasted was salt. I don’t know if it was in the bun, in the patty, or maybe too much was put on the burger. But frankly, the amount of salt was way too much.

The fries were lukewarm at best and did not have any flavor.

My friend enjoyed her meal much more.

She said she didn’t taste any salt with her smashburger. The batter on her onion rings was smooth, not the kind that crunches and falls off when you bite into the onion ring. And, she said the onion taste wasn’t overpowering.

There weren’t any dessert items on the Five Bros. Grill menu, but there were milkshakes (chocolate, vanilla and strawberry). My friend asked if she could have a strawberry shake. Since this was just before Christmas, I was in a festive mood and coughed up the $5.99.

I took a few sips of her shake, and they were the best part of my meal. The shake had the perfect texture — not too runny and not too thick. And the strawberry taste was just right.

Smashburger with grilled onions and Pepper Jack Cheese

The cost of our meal before tax was $36.97. As you can tell, I was not impressed with my experience at Five Bros. Grill. However, my friend enjoyed her food. Maybe my salty burger and nearly cold fries were an exception, not the rule. Still, I am giving Five Bros. Grill Two Forks.

Next time I’m hungry for a burger, I will go to a burger place. Make that a hamburger place.